What if I suspect mental illness in my child?


January 29, 2021

Those who are parents know that parenting isn’t just a job; it is all the jobs. From cooking, cleaning, ensuring the well-being of our children, and many other tasks, parenting is far from easy. Children grow up and go through many different phases and learning experiences, but how do we know when it isn’t just a tantrum anymore and that it may be something to be concerned about? Mental illness is often unacknowledged or not discussed in families for fear of judgment and stigma. Identifying and establishing services and gaining access to the right care can also be overwhelming to figure out.

When a child receives a mental illness diagnosis, it can feel like an overwhelming amount of responsibility or parents may blame themselves or question their parenting. When we start to notice changes that seem to be significant in our children, it is important to acknowledge those changes. By seeking resources, support, and care, parents can connect with strong systems of support, both for themselves and for their children. Below are some common diagnoses children can have:

  • Anxiety
  • Depression
  • Mood Disorders
  • Eating Disorders
  • ADHD
  • Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
  • Autism Spectrum Disorder

Children can also develop some of the same mental health conditions as adults, but the symptoms may look a little different. Children often don’t have the vocabulary to explain what is going on internally so it is important for parents to acknowledge changes in mood and behavior. If you are noticing any of these signs in your child, connecting with a primary care physician or a specialist is recommended to assure appropriate treatment.

  • Difficulty Sleeping
  • Weight changes
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Persistent sadness
  • Hurting self or talking about it
  • Talking about death or suicide
  • Poor academic performance
  • Loss of motivation
  • Ongoing worry about one or many topics
  • Inability to relax
  • Appear to not be in the present moment at times
  • Talking or whispering to self frequently
  • Constantly defying authority
  • Isolating or withdrawing from others
  • Stomachaches Extreme outburst or increased irritability
  • Change in tone of voice (lower and slower, or increased pace)

Here are some tips for managing overall mental health:

  • Talk about what is going on, at a level your child will understand.
  • Be patient. Sometimes the symptoms are unnoticed by the child.
  • Don’t ignore symptoms. Acknowledge what they are and seek to understand the impact it may be having on your child.
  • Be their advocate. You are their voice for help.
  • Set limits. Boundaries can be helpful to ensure stability.
  • Stick to a regular routine. Kids are likely to respond more positively when they know what to expect.
  • Balance the demands of life.
  • Tune into your child’s emotions, know their signs and symptoms so you can be there to support when they are present.
  • Teach your child how to manage when symptoms arise using techniques such as mindfulness or breathing.
  • Be ready to actively listen and respond when your child needs comforting.
  • Praise your child for their strengths and abilities.
  • Ensure you are engaging in self-care for yourself.

For additional resources the following links may be helpful:

Learning to Help Your Child and Your Family: https://www.nami.org/Your-Journey/Family-Members-and-Caregivers/Learning-to-Help-Your-Child-and-Your-Family

Mental Health Conditions Seen in Childhood: https://www.nami.org/Blogs/NAMI-Blog/October-2019/Mental-Health-Conditions-Seen-in-Childhood

Written by: Meaghan Warner, LCSW-S